Goat Simulator 3 is filled with clothing for you to collect and equip onto your goat. While there are a lot of different clothing items that don’t offer anything special, many clothing items have abilities that can help you traverse the map, paint the walls, or cause mass destruction. Depending on the items you equip, you can create serious mayhem across the city and the outer areas. This guide aims to show you some of the best clothing abilities in Goat Simulator 3 ranked from worst to best.
10. Ghost Movie Prop
The Ghost Movie Prop isn’t the most destructive clothing item in the game but it is one of the most iconic. If you aren’t aware, this item is styled after the Ghost Trap from Ghostbusters. The only difference between the movie version and the game; the Goat Simulator version releases the captured ghosts and allows them to possess the people wandering the streets of downtown. Possessed humans will perform strange actions as they spin and float away.
9. Firework Launcher
There have been multiple open-world games over the years that give you a rocket launcher that shoots fireworks as a weapon, such as Saints Row and Grand Theft Auto V. Goat Simulator 3 takes fireworks and makes them very destructive. Launch a firework from the Fireworks Launcher and you will see people, cars, and the neighbor’s cat go flying through the air. Hit a person with it to make them go out like a star in a flash of light. Just don’t press Alt + F4.
8. Rocket Boots
Everyone has that secret dream of wanting to be a secret agent or even a superhero. Well, you won’t be a superhero in Goat Simulator but at least you can pretend with the Rocket Boots. This set of fancy footwear allows you to access a dash that launches you forward with great speed. While there can be a few glitches, most of the time these boots will send you flying around town, crashing into things at high speeds. Combine them with a set of wings and you can spend hours soaring across the sky.
7. Goat Queen
Have you ever thought about how it would be amazing to be the queen of all goat kinds? You could have countless subjects, all of them goats, bowing before you. After ranking up in the Illuminati, not only will you find a fancy new throne waiting for you, but a skull mask as well. The Goat Queen head allows you to summon your loyal subjects with the press of a button. They will fall from the sky around you, pummeling anything caught in their path. Unfortunately, they won’t move after hitting the ground, but the effect is still there.
6. Leaf Blower
Life on the farm and in the big city isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes, after a long day of causing mayhem, you need to get to work and clean up your mess. The Leaf Blower backpack is a great tool that can be turned on and off at will. Once on, it stays on and allows you to blow away anything that is in your path, including large trucks. Anything that isn’t nailed down will go soaring through the air when it feels the destructive force of your Leaf Blower.
5. Space Helmet
There are a lot of items that have similar effects to one another so it is nice to see clothing items that stand out, and nothing stands out as much as the Space Helmet. While this item is unfortunately only available as part of the Digital Downgrade Edition of the game, it is worth using. Activating this helmet creates an anti-gravity field around you, allowing you to jump higher, hit people harder, and make objects float. Plus you get the benefit of looking like you’re straight out of a sci-fi movie.
4. Channitatium Shield
For all of the comic book fans out there, Goat Simulator made sure to add a tribute to the one and only Captain America. After delving into the cosplay world, you can emerge with the Channitatium Shield. Though it may not look like it, this shield is just as strong as Vibranium and can even disobey the laws of physics as it bounces around the map. Launch this shield at any target and it will keep bouncing until you call it back. You can even get yourself an entire cosplay outfit to go along with the shield.
3. Demon Face
Some clothing items let you blow things up and others let you blast off like Team Rocket from Pokémon. These items are fun to use, but nothing causes true chaos in the same way that the Demon Face does. Complete with massive horns and glowing eyes, the Demon Face head allows you to create a whirlwind of chaos that sucks in nearby objects and people and swirls them together until you tell it to stop. Warning: This whirlwind does have a habit of causing spontaneous combustion, especially when cars are involved.
2. Karring
Excuse the massive horns and focus on the old lady sitting on the goat’s back in a rocking chair while holding a bazooka. This backpiece is called Karring and this little old lady packs a punch. This piece of clothing gets extra points for being extremely unorthodox and absurd. To obtain this clothing item, you need to go through an entire Wolfenstein–style basement filled with bazooka-wielding grandmas. While you might think that grandma fires rockets, she actually shoots large yoga balls that can throw people and cars.
1. Satellite Dish
If you haven’t had the experience yet, find a satellite dish on the roof of a barn, skyscraper, or news van, and walk into it. You will disappear into the satellite dish before getting launched into the unknown. Sometimes, these satellite dishes are lined up and can take you great distances. You can get one of these dishes on your back and it allows you to share this teleportation technology with the world. Activate the Satellite Dish on your back to absorb an item next to you like a person, car, or lemonade stand, and activate the dish again to launch the object across the world. That’s the power of radio waves!
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Aden Carter
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